I’m a busy body. I can also be extraordinarily lazy. These two states seem to be in conflict, and they are to a certain extent. I oscillate between them. But most of the time when I’m being physically lazy, I’m mentally obsessing over what I should be doing, so my mind is still busy. It’s making to-do lists and developing new strategies and inventing. I’m always inventing.
It’s part of my personality. If you’ve ever heard of the “Real Colors” or “Four Colors” personality test, then you’ll understand why I’m always inventing. I’m a Green. According to the test, as a Green I’m confident, mentally strong, logical, and inventive. I have high expectations, I’m knowledgeable and I enjoy my own company. For me, work is play and that’s the truth. And it’s the Green in me that inspires this blog and all my little efforts.
It isn’t easy being Green (thank you Kermit), mostly because I’m uneasy when my emotions get the best of me. I fear big, inevitable, emotions such as grief and so that limits me in my relationships. I also get bored with established routines, because I want to invent a new one. It’s a terrible cycle.
Anyway – the point is, even when I’m being physically lazy, I’m not resting. I’m obsessing. I’m connected. I’m inventing. Well yesterday, I got knocked onto my ass. I woke up feeling pretty terrible, slow and achy and tired. So I called in sick. I spent most of the day in my pajamas, either on the couch or in bed, and I checked out mentally. I let my brain rest and focus on the crap I was watching on TV. And while I may have thought about recipes I’d like to try or things I’d like to accomplish a little bit, it was way less. There were moments of temptation, when I thought – hey, I could surely do some laundry while I’m home or bake another batch of muffins. Nope. My body wouldn’t let me do it. So I gave in to the Rest. The Rest embraced me and I let it. And I loved it and it healed me.
I looked up the word rest, and here’s the definition:
rest 1 (rst) n.
1. Cessation of work, exertion, or activity.
2. Peace, ease, or refreshment resulting from sleep or the cessation of an activity.
3. Sleep or quiet relaxation.
4. The repose of death: eternal rest.
5. Relief or freedom from disquiet or disturbance.
6. Mental or emotional tranquillity.
7. Termination or absence of motion.
8. A device used as a support: backrest.
God is the ultimate creator, the ultimate inventor, and is all the colors of the personality test. And yet, God even knew to take a break on the seventh day. I’d like to think that God still takes breaks and watches reruns of Friends while laying in a big comfy bed. God wants us to rest. It’s the only way we can keep going.
Today, I woke up refreshed and motivated. I cleared out my inbox before 7 a.m., followed my routine, and felt better than I have in a few weeks. Thank you Rest. You rock.
So it goes without saying, that I need to prioritize rest higher. I need to let go of the guilt and not wait for some illness to make it happen. There’s no one in my life that wouldn’t benefit from me taking a breather, and I’m sure that’s the case for all of you.